


I'm going off the rails (of a Crazy Train)

by Emrysinmytardis



Category: Megamind (2010), Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Chuckles - Freeform, Crack, I am so very sorry, Issac/boyd/erica are superheros, M/M, Magical Stiles Stilinski, Megamind!AU, Not so evil-henchman Scott, Robot!Lydia, Sunshine Scott, Supernatural - Freeform, THIS WONT GET OUT OF MY HEAD, Un-betad, Werewolves are still a thing, badass lydia, derek is a grumpy news anchor, i think, not really - Freeform, peter is always a creeper, supervillain!stiles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-22
Updated: 2015-03-23
Packaged: 2018-03-19 01:24:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3591102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emrysinmytardis/pseuds/Emrysinmytardis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Megamind!AU nobody asked for..<br/>Where Stiles loves capes. Scott isn’t as evil as he thinks. Derek grudgingly hates everything. Erica, Boyd and Issac are superheroes. And it’s discovered that there really is a thin line between love and hate..</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Dastardly Deeds

**Author's Note:**

> Hey brochachos... This is my first fic in the tw fandom and I'm so so very sorry for what you're about to read. Sincerely. I am.  
> (Also I do not own any characters or people or anything to do with teen wolf! I also do not own the base plot either as MegaMind is a creation that I could even begin to come up with)

Stiles could definitely, if he were so inclined, escape the horrific rainbow painted walls of his cell without any effort whatsoever. None. At all. He was MasterMagic after all, greatest supervillain to ever roam the supernatural earth, also the only one to break the Beacon Hills record for ‘Most Plans Foiled In Two Days’ but he’d rather not talk about that.  
It was a dreadful day and he prefers to not dwell on it.  
Anyways, it stands to reason that Stiles (with all his evil, dramatic-cape-flapping glory) could once again break out of the Beacon Hills County Jail with minimal effort, he was a Spark after all. But apparently Chris Argent had brought out the metaphoric big guns and completely rid the surrounding space of residual magic, leaving none for him to manipulate.  
Foiled again, goddammit.

So instead by using his legendary brains and smarts, he contacted the most evil of henchman he knew in all the land. His best-friend-sometimes-werewolf Scott McCall, who answered the prison call with a cheery, unnecessarily Un-Evil. “Hey Stiles!”  
Stiles sighed. He was still working on the ‘most-evil’ part. “Scott, my favourite of all the evil henchman in the land-”  
“I’m the only henchman you know in the land.”  
“I need you to come bail me out.” Stiles hissed through the phone speaker. “Argent has completely blanketed the jail in magic prevention sigils and I’m kinda stuck.”  
Scott whined back through the phone. “Last time I did that I got thwacked on the nose by a disgruntled security guard who you magicked a donkeys tail on him!”  
“Well that guy was a complete ass-” he waited for the resulting giggle. “And I stand by my actions! But you will be pleased to know I have not done such a thing this time around!”  
“Buuuuuuuut-”  
Stiles glared at the phone. “C’mon don’t be a baby, McCall. We’ll miss out on the Triple Threat tribute otherwise. I have plans, major plans.”  
Scott seemed to brighten up at the mention of ‘plans’. “You’re gonna-”  
“I’m gonna.”  
“Even with the?”  
“Even with the-”  
“Are you sure it will work?”  
Stiles blew a raspberry down the phone. “Just come pick me up! And no flirting with the deputy!” He practically chucked the phone back onto the speaker and innocently followed the guard (unfortunately Donkey Tail was not in today due to a severe case of fleas) back to his own cell.  
Chris Argent followed up soon after. “You have a gift, Stiles.”  
“MasterMagic! My name is-”  
“From Triple Threat apparently.” He smirks through the barred window and reads off what looks like a black card. “Sorry you won’t make it to the tribute, Stilinski. Here’s a Batman stopwatch for you to time the seconds you’ll be stuck in there. ”  
Stiles found himself smirking in return, only just managing to hold back an evil laugh along with it.  
“What a pity, Allison rather likes Batman actually; I think I’ll give it to her. But here, as condolence, you can take the note.”  
Chris slipped the note through the food flap and chuckled until Stiles couldn’t hear him anymore. Stiles waited for a minute before flinging himself over to the card and fisting the air when the tendrils of magic flowed through his fingertips. Not very much, but just enough to transport right outside…..  
He let the pulsating light below his ribcage flow to his fingers and twist the magic until he felt the mid-morning sun on his face and turned to see the his Betty chillin in the sunlight. He laughed and flung himself to the busted up door, thwacking it hard before opening it.

“Heya Scotty boy!” Stiles laughed as Scott jumped into the passenger seat. “Great idea with the card magic! How did you even get that past Argents detection system?”  
Scott beamed and pulled on his seatbelt. “I drowned it in werewolf saliva and perfume!”  
Stiles found himself less impressed. “Erica.”  
“Erica.” Scott beamed. “That’s why I put it from Triple Threat! Those three are always spiting you so I thought it natural that they send you a gift and Erica’s scent was the easiest to copy.”  
Stiles was just glad he was away from all those rainbows, to be honest. Evil, rainbows are not. “You are the best henchman I have ever had!”  
“I’m the only henchman-”  
“Annnd off to the Beacon we go!” Stiles roared as he chucked his Jeep into gear, and sped off with Scott grinning happily next to him.

**

Derek was completely ready to tear out Peter’s throat by the time he had unpacked his stupidly expensive camera.

“I’m just saying Derek. You should consider moving on to bigger and better things. Leave this small, petty pack and come join me in New York. They actually-”  
“Peter.” Derek growled. His Uncle wouldn’t give up, he knew, but he also loved watching Derek read out his stupid pieces on air so Derek switched on his microphone and nodded stiffly. “I’m ready to go to air.”  
Peter smirked like he knew what Derek was doing. “You won’t be able to deny me much longer nephew, I know you’ll follow me sooner or later.”  
Derek glared his most ferocious glare and completely ignored the fact he was related to a psychopath.  
Peter smiled innocently in response and mouthed ‘three, two, one’ before the red light above the lens flicked on and Derek pasted on his fakest, less intimidating smile.  
“For years this small town of Beacon Hills has been the brunt of many attacks by the nastier sides of the supernatural, but today we mark the emergence our saving grace-” Derek ground his teeth subtly as he read Peter’s script. “The people who all of us have to thank for our continued existence. Today we pay back those acts of saving us, caring for us, just to show our saviours that we care as much in return. This is Derek Hale, reporting from the Triple Threat Dedication Day.”  
Derek may actually kill his Uncle. He’s absolutely sure no one would actually care.  
“Oh Derek that was marvellous!” Peter gasped as he pulled his stupid camera off his shoulder. “Such a charming boy.”  
Derek felt his eyes flash red as he growled. “Peter-”  
His uncle turned and began striding back to news van. “Yes, yes! I know! You love my work, and I’m always thankful for your continued-.” 

Derek didn’t really hear what creepy thin his uncle finished with due to the fact he was poked in the eye, sprayed with something that smelled horrendous and pulled through a hole that felt far too small to fit his shoulders. As he began to fight back, claws growing and eyes flashing red, a quiet, peaceful black fell across his mind like it was being chased by a soft breeze.  
He only glanced a flicker of brown puppy eyes before he was out like a light.  
Derek could only feel grateful that he was away from Peter.


	2. Witty Banter is Compulsory When Living as a Super Villain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again the basis storyline and characters are not my own im just mushing them together! And the little justice banter near the end is from the movie as it is probably the greatest interaction from any movie ever and needed to be included :)

Stiles was absolutely sure as all hell that this plan was perfect. He had dedicated all three hours of his time in prison to plot out each possible course that could take shape after kidnapping Triple Threat's alpha. Honestly there is no way they could foil his grand scheme this time. It was simply not possible.

See this was all very good and well. . . Except for the fact that Derek Hale wasn't actually at all threatened by his rather threatening presence. As soon as the bag had been lifted from the alpha's head, the absolutely infuriating smirk had appeared and Stiles felt like screaming. Screaming was, however, meant for kidnapped news reporters who couldn't possibly comprehend the danger they were in until Stiles released the details of his truly ingenious plan.

Still, he threw a desperate glance over at Scott and sort of flailed a bit. "Why isn't he threatening us and screaming-"  
"I never even screamed once!"  
"For his stupid pack to come save him anymore!?" Stiles finished, raising his voice above Derek's indignant shout.  
Scott shrugged and gestured to the reporter. "Maybe because he's like twice the size of you and could get out at any moment." He mumbled like the traitor he was.  
Derek smiled a gratefully pained smile and gestured towards Scott with his head. "At least he has the brains to understand I have super-strength at could easily snapped these ropes. Not like some boring, predictable and talentless idiots who manage to trip over thin air-"  
"Then get out of them!" Stiles roared angrily, pointing a black gloved finger in Derek's face. "Go on try! It's not like the wolfsbane I threaded into the rope has any effect on werewolves anyway! It's not like I'm that smart to think of your stupid werewolf voodoo! Stop underestimating me goddammit!"  
Derek lifted an eyebrow, barely looking unaffected at the news that he couldn't escape the bindings. "You should stop overestimating yourself. You're the most clichéd, horrible villain I have probably ever seen in my entire life."  
"Oh!?" Stiles was pissed now, moving slowly over to his control panel. "Is that what you're stupid sourwolf brain thinks?!"  
"Yeah. It is." Derek deadpans, and wholly looks unimpressed with the whole affair.  
"Well!" Stiles pulls a lever. "How about this for clichéd?!"  
"Electric eels!" Derek's smirk makes Stiles furious as the floor opened to reveal a tub of electric eels. "I had thought-"  
"Or this?!" Stiles yells over him.  
Derek yells back over the roar of a motor. "Chainsaw!"  
"How about-!"  
"Childish!"  
"Or-"  
"Tacky!"  
"Oh, so scary!"  
"So terribly unintimidating." Derek dared to laugh at his defeated expression. "When will you be sick over being on the losing side Stiles!"  
Stiles felt Scott nudge his shoulder. "Hey, maybe he's-"  
"My name is MasterMagic!" His throat felt horse and his eyes stung because he is a damn good super villain. He is making his parents proud, he made sure he will. They did not die to let a loser carry on their-  
"Stiles!" Scott grabbed his shoulders and squeezed him tight. "Stiles, breathe. C'mon, with me Stiles okay? Just keep breathing, it's okay."  
Stiles stared into Scott's eyes and concentrated on his breathing and felt his pulse slow and his lungs relax. He drew in a long breath.  
"You good?" Scott asked.  
Stiles nodded and clapped him on the shoulder. "Thanks buddy."

"How touching." Derek drawled and budged in his seat. "You couldn't have gotten a nicer chair? It's the same damn chair every single time."  
"Don't worry my favourite reporter." Stiles smirked and leant down at eye level with the werewolf. "Once Triple Threat is eliminated, I will have no reason to ever see your annoying face again, and you mine." Stiles paused and grinned wickedly. "Except for on every billboard and building throughout the city!!!"  
Derek rolled his eyes and Stiles pulse spiked with anger. "You really think Triple Threat will fall for whatever stupid scheme you've got planned?"  
"We know they will." Scott interrupted, sounding a lot more enthusiastic. "Because we have you!"

***

Boyd was not really sure why they were being celebrated. All they did was keep rogues out of the city and repeatedly throw the kind-of-annoying-yet-kind-of-amusing "super villain" that "threatened" the town's peace. Stiles (because everyone knew that stupid "MasterMagic" was never ever going to be a thing) was as much of a threat to their safety as a puppy is to a bear, except the fact that Scott was more likely to use puppy-eyes as a defence. Honestly their partnership was kind of a disaster. Boyd has literally no clue as to why they chose Villainy as a career. 

Erica thinks their both adorable, of course. Ever since she first met Stiles and Scott she took to pinching their cheeks through prison bars or tapping them on the bum when they've managed to glue themselves to the wall of the local Taco Bell. Boyd doesn't care as long as she taps his bum when she stops messing around. It's just their thing. Don't question it.  
Issac, on the other hand, had taken a shining to Scott right from the beginning.

"Do we have to??" Erica whined as they were lining up behind the large red velvet curtain hiding their presence from the citizens of Beacon Hills.  
"Yes, we do. Derek wanted us here so we're going to-"  
"Do you think Stiles will show up with Scott?" Issac gleefully interrupted. "I mean he's probably already got out-"  
"But that doesn't matter, does it Issac?" Boyd sighed and rubbed his temples. "We're here to show the city that we're united and strong as a pack."  
Boyd ignored the mocking looks Erica and Issac shared. He was packmates with a bunch of three year olds.

They were only waiting a few more minutes before the curtains dropped and the cheers of an entire town welcomed their presence. Boyd shared a glance with the other two before all of them shifted into beta form and lunged forwards with an almighty roar. The sound echoes for what was probably miles and Boyd felt the connection between them thrum beneath his skin as they raced around the crowd, leaping over heads and putting on a power performance like no other. 'The Big Bad Wolf' began to play and Boyd found himself cracking a grin as he made his way to the podium at the centre of the shallow pool outside the museum. All three leaped up and stood facing the crowd in the circular pillar.

"Good morning Beacon Hills!!!!!" Erica roared happily and the crowd answered with a unanimous cheer.  
Issac pumped the air with his fist and spread his arms. "We are Triple Threat!!!"  
Boyd shook his head at the theatrics before gesturing for the cheers to die down. "Today you have granted us with a gift we did not ask for. A whole museum, dedicated to lycanthropy is something we as a pack could never dream of. So we say thankyou!"  
Erica howled and clapped her hands. "THANKYOU! For fighting the threats to this city right along side us!"  
"For supporting us!" Issac continued.  
"For giving us the chance to defend YOU!" Boyd finished.  
The answering cheers were the loudest yet, children laughing and pointing while adults whistled and yelled.  
"We owe you everything Beacon Hills! And we wont-"

A sudden scream in the crowd had the three wolves turning and scenting the air with tilted heads. When the humanoid L.Y.D.I.A multiplied throughout the crowd, Boyd signalled for fighting formation. They had leaped from the pillar to take on each machine before a dark fog descended upon the city centre. Boyd backed up against the other two, not being able to scent a thing through the thick fog.

"Helllooo Beacon Hell!!!!!!!!" The over-dramatic voice of Stiles echoed through the fog causing a unanimous gasp from the crowd. "How are the weak little humans doing today hmmm??"  
Boyd huffed and spun to find a large screen projected to show Stiles pale, angular face. "Stiles!" Boyd gritted through clenched teeth.  
"My name is MasterMagic you snivelling dog!" He sneered back, irritation only showing for a second before disappearing. "How dare you-"  
"Is Scott with you?!" Issac shouted hopefully, pushing in front of Boyd.  
There was a kerfuffle as Stiles rolled his eyes before being shoved heavily to the left. Scott's face appeared, smiling happily. "Hey Issac! Oh wow is that a new costume?"  
"Yeah, it's-"  
"Enough!" Stiles bellowed angrily, pushing Scott out of frame. "It has been too many times that you three puppies have halted my ingeniously evil operations, too many to count, too many to even remember half of them! But this time I will not lose, and you three will finally be eliminated for good!!!"  
The only people impressed with this declaration were the crowd, the wolves were too busy trying to pinpoint where the wizard was hiding through his scent.  
Erica huffed a laugh and crossed her arms. "Oh Sweetums, you are adorable."  
"I am not-"  
"But be a dear and get this over with so we can throw your ass back in prison."  
Stiles smiled a wicked smile and raised a finger. "Only if you wouldn't mind never seeing you're precious Alpha again!" The camera swivelled and Derek's completely 100% done face appeared on screen. "Say hello Derek!"  
"Shut the fuck up Stiles." Derek drawled before levelling the camera with an annoyed look.  
Boyd sighed and questioned how the hell Stiles kept getting the slip on Derek while Issac roared angrily. "Tell us where he is!"  
"Not until-"  
"We're at the abandoned lighthouse!" Derek growled lowly.  
Stiles squealed and spun the camera back. "No! Not we're not!"  
"We'll see you soon Der Bear!!" Erica blew a kiss and joined Boyd and Issac as they raced through the streets towards the lighthouse.

***  
"And they're approaching the lighthouse Stiles." Scott squinted at the radar Stiles had fitted outside. "Fast."  
Stiles internally laughed and spun to face Hale. "It seems your little pack are on their way."  
"They sure are." Derek nodded and narrowed his eyes. "Just give it up Stiles. you're not going to-"  
"Wolves approaching in three-"  
Stiles noticed Derek duck his face away from the concrete wall.  
"Two."  
He bit his lip to hide his victorious smile.  
"One!"

A crash sounded over the com Stiles fitted to the lighthouse and jumped gleefully when Derek's head snapped up towards the should-be-destroyed-to-tiny-pieces-wall.  
"Oh, no!" Stiles sighed, dancing over to stand before Derek's angered gaze. "You didn't think you were in the real lighthouse, did you?!"  
He swiped a hand and the illusion Stiles had cast crumbled around them, leaving the inside of the old subway station revealed.  
"What-"  
Stiles summoned L.Y.D.I.A with a wave of his hands. "Lyds my favourite gal pal! Can you project the image from the lighthouse?"  
The humanoid rolled her eyes and strutted to face the wall. "Can I? Stiles you insult me."  
The image showed the already closed off entrance trapping the three wolves within the circular room of the lighthouse floor. 

"Aha!" Stiles sudden exclamation seemed to startle them as they spun to face the hologram L.Y.D.I.A managed to project. "It seems you have fallen right into my trap!"  
Erica pushed forward and snarled. "You can't trap justice Stiles! It's an idea, a belief!"  
Stiles rolled his eyes and paced across screen. "But even the most heart-felt beliefs can be corroded over time."  
"Justice!" Issac bellowed. "Is a non-corrosive metal!"  
"But it can be melted down! By the heat of REVAHNGE!" Stiles yelled back.  
"It's revenge and it's best. Served. Cold." Boyd sighed heavily.  
Stiles rose a finger and pointed violently at them. "But it can be easily reheated in the microwave of evil!!!"  
"Well!" Issac crossed his arms. "I think your warranty is about to expire!"  
"Maybe I got an extended warranty!" Stiles rushed out.  
Erica laughed and shook her head. "Warranties are invalid! If used beyond their intended purpose!"  
"YES YOU'RE ALL PRETTY! SOMEONE GET ME OUT OF HERE!" Derek roared heavily.  
Stiles refused to admit the fact that he jumped a mile in the air but sneered at the wolves anyway. "Of course! That is, if Triple Threat can control the full, concentrated power of the sun!!! FIRE!" He ordered at Scott, smiling devilishly at his three enemies stuck, without a way out. For once, he'd got them, trapped them. Completely and utterly-

"Scott why is it taking so long!?" He grit out steadily.  
Scott shrugged and grinned happily. "It's heating up dude."  
"Heating up?!" Stiles swung around and looked over Scott's shoulder. "The sun is heating up!!???"  
"Umm, yes?"  
Stiles groaned and slapped his hand across his face. "I told you to have it ready. I told you countless-"  
"Hey!" Scott interrupted. "It's not my fault!"  
Stiles smacked his lips and adjusted his collar on his outfit. "Just a moment, it appears we're having technical difficulties-"  
"We're coming to get you Der!" Boyd shouted as the three of them made their way towards the wall they crashed through.  
Stiles slumped and eyed Derek sitting in the chair. "This isn't over you know."  
Derek raised an amused eyebrow before rolling his neck. "Why don't you just give up Stiles? You will always lo-"  
"HOLYFUCKINGSHITNUGGETS!"  
Stiles spun and raised a questioning glance at Scott. "What did she just say?"  
Scott shrugged and Stiles ignored Derek shuffling in his chair to scoot over beside his sidekick. "What kind of trickery is this?"  
Issac spun and struggled a few steps before collapsing to his knees. "You wicked genius! You're dark gift has finally payed off!"  
Stiles watched in utter amazement as each pack member suck to their knees after trying their strength against the walls. "Wha-"  
"These walls!" Erica groaned with shaking limbs. "They're obviously lined with magical runes!"  
Stiles eyed Scott and shrugged helplessly. "Okay?"  
"They're draining our strength!" Boyd grumbled, falling to his stomach. "We cant get out!"  
Stiles strode over to Derek in shock, unaware of Scott pulling on his cape. "The lighthouse is lined with runes?!"  
Derek growled furiously and threw himself to the side, toppling the chair.  
"Seriously?!" Stiles gaped. "That's all I had to do?! Just draw-"  
"STILES!" Scott squeaked, gesturing frantically to the bar that recorded the activity of his death ray.  
He stared at the 'Firing Death Ray' flashing across screen before turning in horror to see the screen erupt in a bright white light before cutting off completely.

The only thing Stiles could hear over his own heartbeat was the agonising howl ripped out of Derek's chest.


End file.
